I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
