love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
