How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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