Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
