Christians are straight up FREAKS
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
