I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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