she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
We have started to decorate penises.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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