Those balls look pretty dangerous.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
