When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
