She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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