I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize