well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
