I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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