I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
