I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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