you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
