It was confusing and full of hummus
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize