i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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