Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(571): View more from Virginia

non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.

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(323): View more from California

Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.

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(914): View more from New York

yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans

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(847): View more from Illinois

Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.

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(757): View more from Virginia

Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm

(1-757): View more from Virginia

Dick in a box?

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(718): View more from New York

It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.

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(314): View more from Missouri

She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?

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