like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
