so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
