i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
