Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize