so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
