Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
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