I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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