it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
