Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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