Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize