Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
