So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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