ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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