Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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