its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
