Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize