Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
