I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
