I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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