Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize