Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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