This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
as a side note pls kill me
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