Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
