Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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