just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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