Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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