everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
