Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
You left your phone here
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