i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
That's when you crack a 10am beer
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Randomize
