but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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