True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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